Body image during pregnancy and postpartum

“It’s really an awakening — when you get pregnant and have a child — that the female body is the most amazing machine imaginable.” — Alyssa Milano

I have just returned to work from maternity leave. After having had my first child, I am in awe of what my body has done for me in growing and nourishing my child both whilst I was pregnant and once my daughter has been born. Yet, for many, pregnancy and the postpartum period can be a very challenging period for their relationship with their body.

Whilst pregnant, your body changes A LOT. This change can feel very uncomfortable. Worse, you can't make the food choices that YOU want to make for YOURSELF alone. Whilst pregnant, you are making choices for your body based on another little human. It is almost as though your body isn't yours anymore. And once your child is born, the period of change for your body doesn't stop there. Perhaps you decide to breastfeed and continue to use your body to nurture and nourish your little one. Perhaps you are trying to heal from a difficult birth. Or perhaps you are finding that your life, sleep habits, relationships and as a result your food choices and body, just aren't the same as they were before.

WHAT IS BODY IMAGE?

Your body image is the way that you think about your body. Body image effectively describes the picture of your body that you have in your mind. This picture of your body can become very removed from reality if you are spending a lot of time focusing on things that you think of as "flaws" in your appearance. During periods of change we can be much more likely to experience negative thoughts or to be critical of ourselves. This makes us much more susceptible to a poor body image during periods of change as we can experience more frequent negative thoughts about our body. During pregnancy and postpartum, this is compounded by the fact that your body is actually changing a lot too.

So what steps can you take if you are feeling bad about your body during pregnancy or postpartum:

1.CATCH YOUR THOUGHTS

The first step in improving your body image during pregnancy or postpartum is to catch any negative thoughts that you are having about your body with a gentle curiosity. Remember that just because you think a thought, it doesn't mean that it is true or that it reflects reality. Our thoughts have a clever way of warping reality and just focusing on negative things at the expense of positive things. It can help to write your thoughts down or to say them out aloud so that you become aware of the negative chatter that may be playing out in your mind.

2.IMAGINE YOUR SON OR DAUGHTER COULD HEAR YOU

Once you've written down your negative thoughts, it can then help to imagine that your son or daughter could hear the things that you are saying out aloud. Would you want them to hear you talking to yourself so unkindly? Would you talk to THEM so unkindly? Instead, ask yourself, what kind of words would you want them to hear you use when you talk about your body?

3.FOCUS ON WHAT YOUR BODY DOES FOR YOU AND HAS DONE FOR YOU

As your body goes through physical changes either during pregnancy or postpartum, it can send you into a spiral of negative thinking focusing too much on what your body looks like. Instead, it can help to focus more on what your body does for you. It truly is a miracle when you think about how the body has the innate wisdom to grow and nurture a child. The more you focus on this miracle, the easier it becomes to deal with the physical changes that you may be experiencing.

4.SHOW YOURSELF KINDNESS AND GIVE YOURSELF TIME

As you start to challenge your thoughts about your body, it can help to really try to show yourself kindness. Remember that this phase of your life is just temporary and that changes to your body are not necessarily permanent. It is actually very common for your body to change again postpartum too - so just realising that this is just a phase or period in your life can help you to show your body kindness.

5.STOP COMPARING YOURSELF TO PAST VERSIONS OF YOURSELF

One of the biggest threats to good body image during pregnancy and after is spending time comparing your body to what it used to look like. It is natural and inevitable that your body will change during and after pregnancy. Constantly trying on old pairs of jeans or wishing you looked like you did before, will just make you feel miserable. Recognise that your body has just done or is doing some tremendous work in growing a little human and try to realise that you or your body can't be expected to be same anymore.

6.GIVE YOURSELF A BREAK FROM THE SCALES

Weighing yourself too often during pregnancy or afterwards can also send you into a negative spiral. It is important that you gain a healthy amount of weight during pregnancy. Even postpartum, women may find that they end up gaining weight with the stress of a new life, breastfeeding-hunger, sleep deprivation and changed relationships. This is completely normal. It doesn't mean that the weight will stick around forever but it does mean that obsessing over a number on the scale may end up making you feel bad about yourself.

7. SHELTER YOURSELF FROM BOUNCE BACK CULTURE

There is a lot of pressure out there to "bounce back" after pregnancy. Whether this comes in the form of instagram posts on how quickly someone has lost their tummy after birth, magazines talking about the postpartum diets or just friends and family members asking if you're back in your old clothes again. Do what you need to do to set boundaries and shelter yourself from this bounce back culture. You have just grown a human and there is absolutely no rush to get "back" to any weight or shape. In fact, there is no need to feel any need to change or do anything at all. Your body has that natural wisdom to grow and nurture a human, and it can also guide you to nurture and nourish yourself in a way that will support you through this new chapter of your life.

As I myself went through these chapters of pregnancy and the initial postpartum period, I realised how little is out there to support women with their body image and relationship with food in these delicate periods of life. If you would like some support with your body image or relationship with food during pregnancy or postpartum, please reach out to me at info@thefoodtherapyclinic.com

“Postpartum is a quest back to yourself. Alone in your body again. You will never be the same. You are stronger than you were.” - Amethyst Joy